E123 - Revive and Go FourWords with your Wellbeing
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Speaker: [00:00:00] Hello?
Hello, my creative friend. Welcome back to Create Today with Beth Buffington. Now, before we get deep into our conversation today, I want you to just to take a second and think about this and tell me if this is you. Your energy is feeling lower than you are admitting to friends or family or coworkers.
You're still functioning, still productive, still keeping things moving along, but underneath all of that, you're tired and not the kind of tired that a good night's sleep fixes. Now, often when your energy drops like this, most people look at how they go through their day like this. I'm tired, so I am gonna push harder.
Maybe with more grit, more [00:01:00] grind, more gasping. But what if that's not what you need? What if the first step or the next step when you are feeling tired isn't doing more or pushing harder? It's learning how to restore what's been depleted. Because here's what I've noticed in myself and with others that I've coached
The people who feel stuck and overwhelmed and disconnected are typically not lacking discipline. No, they're depleted. You're running outta energy. so to, we're beginning a new series here in Create Today that is built around a framework that I call going forwards. And these are simply four words that I use in my life that I find are powerful tools to [00:02:00] take a look at my wellbeing and figure out what I need to do to make myself happier and healthier in my everyday life.
So these four words, my friend, are revive, realize, refine. Release. And for years I've taught this framework as a tool to support creative practices and growth for artists and for artists who are running creative businesses. And if you are one of those people, listen in. 'cause this is gonna be a great help to you.
But here is what I've learned that this practice of revive, realize, refine, release. It actually is a powerful tool for anyone out there. You do not have to be a creative to make these words work for you. So I'm shifting how I'm teaching it [00:03:00] because creativity I've discovered isn't something that you do just to make arts and crafts.
Creativity is something that can help you feel better. Live better and actually restore your energy. And it starts here with the word that most people often skip when they're thinking about how to get through their day or how to take care of themselves. And that word is revive.
So let me ask you something again. Okay. And I, I want you to think about this and answer honestly. When was the last time you felt truly rested? not just a little better and not, I sat down but never stopped actually doing or thinking something.
I mean, how many of us sit down to relax and we also fold laundry, I am talking about resting, Now, if your first answer to this question is. Honest, [00:04:00] and the answer is, I don't remember, or I actually don't have time for that.
Or Beth, what do you mean by truly rested? I'm not sure I understand what the definition of that might even be. Um, those are fair statements. And this important information is for you because most of us have been quietly running on empty for a long time, and we've gotten really good at it. We've normalized it.
We've convinced ourselves that being tired. It's just part of being an adult, part of having a full life, a demanding job, a promising career, a family. Sort of just being a responsible person, right? And I've worked for businesses and corporations where being tired and exhausted was a badge of honor that you wore.
You would brag about how late you stayed at work, [00:05:00] how little sleep you let yourself get. Because you worked so late and got up early to come back into the office, the longer the hours, the less sleep you were getting. That meant you were a hard worker, you were a good employee. if you had eight hours of sleep, well, you looked weak and maybe just a little lazy.
We have a culture that celebrates exhaustion as a commitment that treats rest, like something that you earn after everything else is done.
After the kids are settled, after the deadline is met, after the inbox is empty, after the laundry is folded. But that moment of being done, it never comes. And your body, your brain, does not work at its best when it is running on empty. So let's talk about what the word revive
Means to your wellbeing because I wanna be [00:06:00] clear about something right from the start. Revive is not an indulgence, it is not laziness, and it is not gonna let you fall behind. Revive is the moment you decide I am going to pay attention to my energy before it completely disappears, before I am completely burned out.
It's an awareness and it's honesty. And then revive is a choice. And here's the truth, most people avoid. You already know when you're depleted. You just keep overriding it. You override it with caffeine and with energy drinks, with the to-do list, with the next thing and the next thing. And you tell yourself you'll rest when things calm down.
But things don't calm down completely, do they? They just keep changing shape. So REVIVE is deciding to stop waiting for the perfect moment to take [00:07:00] care of yourself. And revive then lets you start resting now when you need it so that you can replenish your energy.
and here's where I wanna give you some real science facts because I have found that understanding why rest matters can finally give a lot of people permission to actually. Do it. If you know that science is actually showing you why something makes you better, makes you stronger, often you'll decide that that's something worthwhile for your life.
This isn't just woo people, it's real science. So let's look into that. When you ignore your body's need for rest,
whether that's sleep or mental downtime, or simply just slowing down your pace, your brain. Doesn't keep working at full capacity.
It starts to break down [00:08:00] in very specific measurable ways. You see your brain's prefrontal cortex, the part that's responsible for decision making and focus and emotional regulation, and yes, creativity. It begins to lose efficiency when it's under that chronic stress. And yes, my friend, fatigue is a form of stress
And research has shown that your prefrontal cortex can actually start to thin over time. Think of this like your brain's executive office, slowly losing its staff at the same time.
your amygdala, the part of your brain that processes fear and threat. It becomes overactive, and this is why when you're burned out, emotions feel harder to manage. everything feels heavier and more fearful and more threatening than it may be really should.
Which means when you're [00:09:00] depleted of your energy, you are likely experiencing a. Feeling overwhelmed by things that didn't use to phase you or reacting emotionally quicker and recovering more slowly. And you also probably are experiencing difficulty concentrating or making even simple decisions.
And here's one that surprises people. Burnout reduces activity in the brain's reward circuits. These are those dopamine pathways that drive motivation and pleasure. That's why depletion of your energy doesn't just make you tired. It can make you feel detached or unmotivated or numb, like nothing quite feels worth the effort anymore.
Are you feeling like that or have you Yeah. If that sounds familiar, I want you to hear this. This is not a character flaw, my friend. This is just your brain running on empty now.[00:10:00]
Now let's talk about sleep, This has been shown to foster creativity by enhancing problem solving and helping the brain form new and unique connections between different pieces of information. So when you consistently cut your sleep short, you're interrupting that process.
Research has found that irregular, inconsistent sleep patterns harm both focus and creativity. And that the more variable your sleep is from night to night, the more your cognitive performance declines across the week. Yikes. And for those of you who feel like you are functioning but not quite firing on all cylinders, brain imaging research shows that people in states of stress and burnout demonstrate
Decreased [00:11:00] connectivity in the networks linked to imagination, and increased activation in the networks responsible for scanning for danger. In other words, a depleted brain isn't just unproductive, it's stuck in survival mode, and that's exhausting, and you cannot feel well or think clearly or find joy when you're stuck in survival mode.
Ah, but here's some really good news, my friend. The good news is that your brain can recover, it can rewire rest isn't just a nice idea. It's the mechanism for that recovery. So if you're feeling foggy or burned out or you've lost something that you can't quite name.
It may not be a motivation problem, and it's probably not a procrastination problem. It might [00:12:00] be a revive problem. So now let's talk about how to actually know where you are right now. So this is kind of a energy check-in,
It's kind of like getting in your car and finding out how much gas you have left in your tank. Same sort of thing, because before you can revive, you have to be able to notice, and this is where I want to bring creativity into this conversation,
You're not making anything artsy here. Instead you are. Using your focus as a creative tool in order to see yourself more clearly. Most of us move through our days without ever pausing to genuinely
check in on ourselves and we should. we might know something feels off, but we haven't stopped long enough to name it. And when you can't name it, you can't respond to [00:13:00] it. and often you don't do anything about it.
It's like. Just never looking at the gas tank in your car until your gas tank is empty and you are stalled on the side of the road and you think, oh, I don't have any gas. That is not good. Right? So here are a few simple ways to start noticing your energy levels, and none of them are complicated and each one takes about 60 seconds.
first, take a moment and think. About how you're feeling, and then describe your energy like you would a weather forecast. And don't overthink it. Just ask, what's the forecast of the energy I feel inside me right now? Is it foggy, stormy? Are there clear skies? is it a little overcast?
Maybe you're predicting a hurricane. No judgment, my friend. Just observation. That's going to help you figure out if your energy levels are [00:14:00] high blue skies, or if they are a little low foggy or a little overcast, or if you're running super low stormy hurricane. Okay? No judgment. Just observation or try this.
Notice the pace. You are doing right now? Are you rushing? Are you dragging? Are you avoiding? Are you spinning your wheels without getting anywhere? This is also going to help you figure out just how you are feeling. Sometimes when you're rushing, it's because you're trying to make up for the fact that you are tired.
Dragging. Obviously you must be exhausted, my friend, and if you're trying to avoid things, that can also be a sign that you need to revive a little bit, get your energy back so you'll be able to tackle those things that you don't want to face. And it goes without saying. If you are just spinning your wheels and you are [00:15:00] getting nowhere, your brain is empty.
You are not going to be able to proceed until you refill that energy tank. So notice your pace, and then I want you to ask yourself this one question today, what is taking more energy than it should right now? And I want you to sit with that. 'cause if you are feeling flat what is draining you of your energy?
sometimes your tank can be full, but the battery is dead. So what is pulling energy from you that is keeping you from being productive. because when you can sit with it and you can name it now, you're not just tired and pushing through you're aware and awareness is always the first real step.
Now we're going to talk about what makes most people not [00:16:00] allow themselves to revive, because that is a huge problem. We in our heart know that we're tired, that we need a rest, and we think we, we just can't. So what do we have to do to tell ourselves we can stop and rest? So here's what I'm talking about here.
You figured out you're tired, but you don't actually allow yourself to respond to that need because as we've already mentioned, most of us have been quietly conditioned to believe that rest is something we have to earn
or it's something that we do when all the stuff we need to do is done. Because stopping to rest means falling behind that. If we slow down, something will fall apart. Now I want you to rethink those thoughts.
So here are seven grounded ways using your creativity as a tool to begin [00:17:00] to give yourself permission to rest. Not someday, not later today, but today. And maybe my friend right now,
Number one, lower the bar on purpose. Choose one thing today and do it at 70%, not poorly. I'm not asking you to just, you know. Phone it in. Just do it without overexertion, without being perfect. You don't have to bring everything you have to. Everything you do every time you do it. And I'm gonna say that one more time.
You don't have to bring everything you have to. Everything you do every time you do it, and I'm looking at all my perfectionists out there.
A rested. You will probably do a project done at 70% better than an [00:18:00] exhausted you would do that same job grinding it out at what you think is a hundred percent when you're actually tired. Does that make sense? Yes. Your energy is really powerful if you're working and you're rested. Number two, create a pause ritual.
So this is taking time to light a candle or just step outside and sit quietly for maybe three minutes. I mean, we're not talking a long time here with no phone in your hand, no tablets, no noise, no one calling to you, and I just want you to be by yourself. And then I want you to say out loud to yourself.
We are catching our breath. We are catching our breath. When you talk to yourself, do you ever do that? I do. I do it all the time. When you talk [00:19:00] to yourself, your body starts to recognize the action you're considering. We're stopping for a moment. This is safe and it is okay to rest, and then you'll actually.
Allow yourself to loosen your jaw and drop your shoulders and slow your breathing and allow yourself to think and rest. Number three, remove one unnecessary decision. Okay, so let's talk about this 'cause this is a big one. Fatigue isn't just physical, it's cognitive. Your brain makes thousands of decisions every day, and that is exhausting.
So what's one thing today that's on your list that you can simplify, that you can delegate, or maybe just let go of today? We all have those things that we, [00:20:00] micromanage, right? Or that we think if I don't do it, it'll never get done.
Right. Let it happen. Let someone else load that dishwasher. Even if they don't do it very well, it's okay. Allow someone else to fold clothes even if they don't fold the towels, like, you know, they should be folded. Just let some of that go so that you have time. To get caught up and revive, it's okay.
So remove one unnecessary decision or task out of your day today. I dare you to do that. Just let it go. Number four, add beauty instead of effort. So. What do I mean by this? This one is super fun and I love to do this for myself. So this is just opening up a window to allow the bird song to come in.
Lighting a scented candle that reminds you of someplace you've been, or is a scent [00:21:00] that just makes you happy and you don't know why. Give yourself flowers when I do this all the time when I'm at the grocery store, shout out to Trader Joe's. I buy myself flowers and you know, I only have to do it like every other week because the flowers from Trader Joe's last a long time.
and they make me happy. Every time I look at them. And here's another thing you can try. Just put on some music that makes you feel good and makes you feel happy. Sometimes energy is revived when you experience something that reminds you that life is good.
Number five, set a stopping point before the day begins. This can be really powerful. 'cause part of being exhausted is we do too much during the day. So if you could tell yourself when your day starts, I am going to put [00:22:00] tools down at this time today. What time would that be?
You decide, but set that time and then allow yourself to just quit for the day. That is super important. So in order to hold yourself to that decision, write it down on your to-do list.
and honor what you've written down, like a meeting you've set with someone that you respect. I mean, you should respect no one as much as you respect yourself.
Number six. Trade stimulation for restoration. I love this one. it is not unusual for us to believe that we can rest while we scroll or watch TV
'cause we've all done this. I'm included. We have a little downtime, and we reach for our phone. And so instead of resting, we are scrolling or we're watching television, or [00:23:00] some crazy video on YouTube.
But my friend, let's think creatively here. Instead of scrolling or consuming videos or watching tv, choose something calmer because scrolling will leave your nervous system overstimulated and it will numb you. no one has spent 15 minutes.
Doom scrolling, and at the end of thattime thought, woo, I feel better now. Let's get back to my day. None of us feel that way. We all feel a bit odd and numb and detached afterscrolling on our phones. So find that quiet space
or go outside and let those birds sing to you, Or allow that time to be in meditation. You can also spend those moments journaling, or sketching or doodling.
All of this works and is a great creative way to [00:24:00] allow yourself some rest just Stay away from your devices. Number seven. Again, we're going to be talking to ourself because this is a really great way to allow yourself to think about what you're thinking, and I want you to say this sentence to yourself out loud.
I am allowed to rest. Let's say that again. I am allowed to rest because that right there. Is the shift you need to give yourself that permission. You don't wanna wait until you crash. Give yourself permission to revive before the crash. Don't be that car that is empty of gas stalled on the side of the highway.
Be the person at the gas station filling a tank when it's only half empty that my friend is the smart driver.[00:25:00]
Now let's take a break to hear a word from our sponsor and be sponsor is me, Beth, from Create Today. If this conversation we are having right now about restoring your energy before you hit the wall, not after this conversation is resonating with you, I want to invite you to explore yourself creatively more.
So my online creative wellness membership is Sylva Sessions, and it is designed to help you reconnect with your energy, your creativity, and yourself to become happier and healthier. And if you're looking for more personal support, I also offer one to one creative coaching. This is where we take these ideas of revive.
Realize, refine and release, and we shape them specifically around your life [00:26:00] and the season of life you are in right now and what you are carrying today. You can find both of these options to continue your creative. Wellbeing @ www.bdi-create.today and check the show notes.
There are links that will take you straight to where you need to go to sign up to register, If you have questions, you can email me and we'll set up a time for a free consultation to discuss what would be best for your needs to find better wellbeing in your life today.
So come and let's create a better today for you together.
revive. It is not a reward. Being able to understand that you [00:27:00] need to revive, that's a responsibility because when you don't intentionally rest, your body will eventually force you to do that.
That's the crash. Most of us are quietly trying to outrun and you cannot outrun that kind of problem if you are not allowing yourself to revive.
There's another way. You can choose to revive. Now today in those small, honest, consistent ways that we've talked about before, it becomes a crisis. And that's not a weakness, my friend. That is straight up wisdom, and here's the science to back it up. The same research that shows what chronic depletion does to your brain also shows that recovery.
Is real neuroplasticity works in both [00:28:00] directions. The brain that got worn down by ongoing stress can with intentional rest, can begin to rebuild. Connectivity returns. Creativity returns the sense that life has color and joy and you can be happy.
Again, that returns, but it doesn't start until you make that decision. And the decision is to allow yourself to revive. So here's what I want you to do after this episode, not tomorrow. Not after things. Finally settle down. Ask yourself this.
Where am I more depleted than I am willing to admit? And then what would it look like to honestly respond to that? not with a whole new routine, just honestly. [00:29:00] Maybe that looks like going to bed 30 minutes earlier tonight. Maybe it's canceling. Just one thing you said yes to out of sheer obligation
whatever it is that is your revive. Review our list of things you can do today. And start your journey to restoration,
Next week we're going to move into that second word of our FourWords framework, and that word is realize. You can't see clearly where you want to go and what you want to realize when you're running on empty. So for right now, for today, for this next week, your only job, my creative friend, is to revive.
and remember that no matter how you decide you need to revive this week, remember that my [00:30:00] wish for you as always is to stay creative, my friend.
